JAMES 1:2-6 I am addicted and I can't quit chewing - so I have to give this to God

I have gone 26 days with no Alcohol, no Drugs and no Gambling.  Only to stretch my brain out across a nicotine dependancy worse than the rest.


I am so addicted to nicotine and chew that I know there is no possible way for me to quit by myself without spiritual help.  because it is beyond the physical dependency, the mental neuro-chemical-electrical brain connections it is to why?  Cognita ergo sum brother.  Awareness of the self.  battle of the duality.  I just know that for some reason in this case, I am weak and must ask Jesus to be strong for me.

I am going to continue to pray, read the bible, go to meetings and focus on relationships.  This one is so much more VIVID and INTENSE.  Seriously it makes the drinking and gambling feel like childs play.  Driving 12 hours to sit in a game.  packing my truck and driving off to the desert for 3 months to drink and play every day.  I put those away so much easier than this.

Weed was harder because it became an everyday habit.  Try to justify because it's legal so there are arguements easily available. 

Nicotine is a serious bitch.  This is going to be a sweet ride. 

1 thessalonians 5:11

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - NIV

I must do this myself so I will know how to do it and can share with others, specifically, to be able to tell them what worked for me and what didn't.

THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT VERSE: 

  JAMES 1:2-6

Consider it pure joy my brothers whenever you face trials of many kinds,  because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.  - NIV

Attitude is key to success.  I am not hating that I am quitting chewing and it is embarassing and slightly psychotic.  This is an opportunity for me to go through it and really learn how to offer something to someone else.  We need to tell people that sometimes to get control you really have to get on your knees literally and pray to Jesus to take it away from you.  I did that.  I went into my bedroom, put my knees on the floor next to the bed bent my head down crossed my hands and prayed to God and Jesus to help me to take the chew away because I can not do it.  They have to do this one.

But its awsome because I'm doing it and it will work.  So I have to be happy now because before I couldn't do it on my own.  I have to be happy now because and I know its wrong to say this traditionally but Its kinda like a little bit of proof that God is real.  I couldn't do something before and I tried.  I pray to God and now I can do it.  See.

and Yes this is an easier trial because I am in control of it in that I picked the day I would quit.  This isn't a sudden suprise of sickness or something out of control.  come across more later.  just want to point out that joy can and should be found especially if you want to let people know about Jesus and have it be in a good way.    I think more people will listen to a positive message than a fear mongering one and take it to heart.

I do want to help change the world and make it better. 

oh last bit for now..... 


Acts 9:1

Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lords disciples. 

Talk about a guy going to change.  Saul becomes Paul.