The Living Word - The Bible

30 Days No Alcohol, No Weed, No Gambling! 

New Years Eve I was looking to NOT go out and reading the Bible.  1 Peter 4:3 You have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do... - NIV

The last couple of days I've been trying to get to, "Is Jesus really real?  Am I just being weak and looking for something to solve my problems for me?  I can feel God working in my life, but..."

I have an American College Education and a strong bend against authority.  In high school my leather jacket was painted with a broken missile and a broken cross.  Religious people seemed pompous, self-righteous and hypocritical.  How can I possibly believe that Jesus was real...was really the Son of God...died...and was then resurrected because he loved us?  Am I being a sucker here?

I've been reading John today and yesterday to try to get some answers.  A lot of what I have been reading lately talks about Jesus and the disciples dealing with disbelief and teaching so people will believe.  Throughout John and Acts Jesus and Paul both go to great effort to link Jesus and the miracles to the prophecy in the old testament.  They are trying to prove to the Jews that he really is the Son of God.  They clearly state that they witnessed these things.  They list descendants from David to Joseph to show the lineage.  Jesus performs miracles.

The death of Lazarus shows how much Jesus tried to prove he was the Son of God so everyone would believe.  Jesus knows Lazarus and loves him.  John 11:5  Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. - NIV  But even after the sisters let him know Lazarus is sick and needs him, Jesus stays away.  He knows Lazarus is going to die and wants to use it as a miracle to show who he is.  John 11:14-15  So then he told them plainly, "Lazarus is dead, and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him." - NIV

After 4 days of being in a tomb Jesus goes out and brings Lazarus back.  John 11:43-44   When he had said this, Jesus call in a loud voice, "Lazarus, come out!"  The dead man come out his hands and feet wrapped with strips of lines, and a cloth around his face. - NIV

Is that proof that Jesus was the Son of God.  If I had been there and witnessed it, yes.  Reading it 2000 years later....well.  It does show the great lengths Jesus went through to try to get people to believe.  He performed so many miracles: raising the dead in at least two stories, healing the blind, curing the lepers, healing the sick, feeding the crowds, walking on water.  He did these in front of witnesses.  He taught thousands of people and performed miracles in front of thousands of people.  The disciples testify to these. 

So much of the New Testament that I've read so far is focused on stating exactly what Jesus did and said and strives to prove he was the Son of God. 

Last night I was starting to think about the Bible and the words of the Bible having power and teaching to the point that they create a physical or metaphysical change in our mind.  I looked up metaphysical and the bible on the Internet and came across some interesting concepts.  Some argue to the term metaphysical and Plato with philosophy.  There are some interesting articles on the neuropsychological and physiological aspects of spirituality and the brain.  So I'm going to drop the metaphysical words and use spiritual.  Holy Spirit. 

John 16:13  But when he, the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. - NIV

Maybe that feeling or recognition of presence I get is the Spirit Jesus was talking about.  To be honest, I'm not 100% convinced, but I am trying to get there.  I read the Bible every day.  I pray every day.  I am trying to do what the Bible tells me to do and I see and feel good things happening in my life every day.  I want to believe.

It does make since that because the only way to eternal life and salvation from sin is through belief in Jesus that as a loving father he would do all he could to make us believe.  He did great things in front of a lot of people to get his point across.  I am grateful because I do feel a presence working in my life helping me get what I need to survive and now leading me to reading the Bible and praying every day.  Maybe it is a leap of faith and a choice to stop looking for more evidence and accept it.  Trust me I want to be forgiven for my sins because I have had some rotten moments in my life and have hurt people.  I don't want to be that way any more.  It isn't just about NOT drinking, smoking and gambling.  It is about the choices I make and the actions I take and changing who I am at the core so when I'm faced with situations I will choose to act outside of my own selfish interest and do the right thing. 

It amazes me that in 2000 years, I'm having the same issues that people had back then.  I'm asking the same questions.  Searching for the same answers.  This Bible, the Living Word of God is helping me to answer them in a very real way.